[The song we all know and love plays] [Love Will Have It’s Sacrifices theme song] Omigod! Carm! What happened? We were stalking some of Vordenberg’s souped up henchbros across the North Quad. It was a trap. They lead us into a shooting gallery. Arrows everywhere. Congratulations, you finally got the Summers and Zetas to cooperate. She managed to drag me into the bushes, but they put an arrow into her chest. I think some of it’s still lodged in there. She needs blood. There’s some in the fridge. I… – didn’t have time to clean it up yet. Hey! Here sweetie. Here’s some liquid courage. Mattie… Where did you bring me? Oh, perfect. Yeah. Terrific to see you too. She needs a surgeon. Or… Someone who spends waay too much time thinking about human dissection. Terrific, rustle up one of your mad scientists and let’s get the show on the road. No. What? No. You guys are on a rampaige and I’m not going to risk my friend’s lives until you and I have an understanding. Understanding? Try this on for size? Your value to me ends the second you can’t or won’t help her. Yeah, yayayayaaa. And as soon as that happens you’re going to kill me in a way that would probably qualify as post-modern art. We’ve had this conversation. Only killing me is not going to help Carm. And as much as you flounce around like the spokesmodel for casual violence – – you care about her. So here’s how its going to be: I’ll call LaF and J.P., and they will help her. and then I will hide the two of you here
until she recovers, and in return neither of you is going to bite, maim, or
kill anyone at all for any reason. because if you do I will have the Baron’s army of stake-happy superminions down here so fast you’ll get whiplash. Understood? Understood. Get your friend. [Laura runs away like a nerd] Seriously, Laura it is 1 a.m. Hello to the chest trauma. We’re going to need gauze. And Peroxide. And possibly ether. Uh – Vampire? We can skip the ether. Miss Karnstein can bench press a Mazda. Will you be the one holding her down? [Zoom Zoom] Ether. Cool. Maybe tranquilizer darts? Have you all lost your minds? They can’t be here. They have been on a killing spree and there are people hunting them all over campus. And she’s getting blood everywhere! They are on their best behaviour, or i’ll call Vordenberg myself. That might be difficult if they’ve ripped out all our throats! Vordenberg will kill them. Like she killed the kids at the newspaper? Oh for the love of – I had nothing to do with your newspaper pals. I wasn’t even in the godforsaken country until days after they were dead – Liar! You killed them. You cut me up and tried to kill me. I never sleep anymore without seeing them. Without seeing their dead eyes looking at me and you did that you did that, and the least you can do is admit it! If I’d done it, I would. You’re still a killer. You’ve always been a killer. Uh guys? The patient being nigh-invunerable makes thoracic surgery easier – but maybe lay off anything that shakes the floor? K? Perry. I know your hearts in the right place Laura, but you’re really not thinking this through. Got it! First try! [High five] I’m always amazed at how much stuff is in there. And there’s always those extra bits that I’m not quite sure what to do with… How are you feeling, darling? Like an overly-enthusiastic veterinarian just played Operation with my innards. Well if that that’s the case, it’s good we’ll be staying put for awhile, while you recover. How did you get little Miss Tightly Wound to agree to that? She promised you were done with your little spree. You have got to be kidding me. It was either that, or take our chances with the Baron’s juiced-up army out there. Perry? I thought we were going to talk later – We dont have time for that. We need to hide them! Now! What? The stormtroopers are coming. Dun Dun Dun Dun, Dun Dun Dun Dun See that subscribe button, you should click it!